This story contains profanity, is graphic, and deals with adult themes.

You've been warned...

Written in the Stars (Stories) - Return to the Garden Gate (Return to Homepage)

Way out here...

© 1999 C-Music

Way out here on the outskirts, the cars are a little less frequent, but it's still real easy for a girl to make a living. I look around at the big night sky with all the crappy neon. It gets sickening after a while, the motels, the gas stations or just the back of a car.
I think back to when I came out here. I was practically pennyless and just needed to get away. I had a lot of big dreams. Some came true, in a way, and some definitely haven't, not yet anyway.
I wait talking with Janie and Sarah, a couple of girls I met last year out here. A couple of their friends just left with a couple of skanky johns. It's warm enough out and I'm in a green camisole and G string. Jerr just went to get somthin' at the Texaco.
Janie's like "hey! Carrie, look at those two college brats over there, let's wig em' a little! Yo! Yo! yeah, you two! ya want some? It's OK baby! come on!"
She starts crackin' up and we all start in, man! she's a riot sometimes. A couple of cars go by and there are a couple more wolf whistles but no cash if yeah know what I mean. It's been ten minutes and I've got better things to do than just stand out here and look pretty. Finally, a car pulls up. He stops, a middle aged guy in a suit, driving a light blue Saab. He points at me and we make eye contact. I say "bye" to the two of them and tell them to tell Jerr who I went with and that we'll be in that motel just across the way there. I open the guy's door and get in.
He smiles and says "hi."        
I fix my hair in his rear-view. "Hi" I say back, less than impressed. In shape, he ain't, and I can smell his sweat.
"What's yer name?" he asks.
"It ain't important, is it? I mean, it ain't like yer gonna remember it later." I manage a smile just to take some of the edge off. I still have to make my money.
"My name is Amy." Meanwhile, I'm thinking, "yeah right, I'll be damned if I'm gonna tell you my real name, you gotta be crazy."
He's got brown hair, going gray and I notice a wedding ring, there's a surprise. The inside of the car is off white plush, with a lousy stale air freshener hanging from the mirror.
I point over at the motel, "in there" I say.
He looks and says "sure babe, no problem."
We turn in and park.
The lot looks dingy, the old orange neon, and the few working lights give it a filthy brown color against the black of the sky out here. Some of the cars look practically abandoned.
He turns and looks me over and I put my hand out.
"Five hundred" I say.
He looks sheepish as he hands me the cash.
"At least I got a rich one" I think, laughing to myself. I put it in my purse and we get out. The woman who runs the place knows me and knows what I do. She doesn't hassle me or my johns. We head up to the room.
I open the door and he turns on the light. It certainly isn't anything special. It's grimy and smells of old cigarette smoke.
He looks at the coin-op bed and I say "go for it."
He puts a quarter in and gets undressed. I follow, like I have far to go. So much for seduction. I put my purse down on the night stand and join him on the bed.
He looks at me again. His eyes are hazel, and I can see a child and an asshole in them, both living in perfect discord.
"Well go ahead" I say, trying to smile a little.
I brush my hair out of my eyes, and he leans over. His skin is rough and I can see his chest hair, dark and patchy, his odor, more present now after a days drive hot and acrid, in the same clothes. He kisses me, at the same time, pawing my breasts. I lay there.
God Damn, if my mother knew what I do. I'm sure she must have caught on by now, besides, she's told me about the men she's been with. She just didn't have the guts to take it as far as I do. She'd be too worried about what her mother would say, and maybe about going to hell.
Well, she's hell. This world is hell. Hell, this room is hell and this stupid bastard on top of me is hell. Hell, I'm even hell sometimes. His tongue moves around my mouth, aimless, not knowing what the hell he's doing. I taste the cigarette he had a half hour ago. I start to move a little to get him going. He's playing with my nipples like inanimate objects. It pisses me off but I don't show it. Right now, as far as he's concerned, I'm loving every minute of this. I wonder if he's thinking about his wife while he's doing me. Disloyal son of a bitch.
I reach down to touch myself. The damn condoms are never lubricated enough. I feel him, hard and hot against the back of my hand.
He stops kissing me and says "why don't you let me do that?" as he reaches a hand between my legs. He moves his face down to my breasts and starts mouthing my nipples. He looks at me and I take him in my hand teasing him a little. He moves down between my legs and goes down on me. I let myself get as aroused as I can, which ain't very much, in this dingy little room with this idiot.
I move a little more and make a few noises, playing it up a bit. He's just as inexperienced now as before. You'd think with the experience he's had away from his home, he'd learn something by now. I reach for the condom on the night stand. I wana get this over with. I sit up as I unwrap it. He smiles. I reach for him and slowly put it on him. Taking his hand, I lay back.
He gets on top of me again, guiding himself with his free hand. I feel him hard, but tentative inside me. I feel his sweat and saliva on my skin. He looks in my eyes, as tentatively as his motions. I wish this would end. Well, if he doesn't finish soon, it's going to, that's for damn sure.; His breathing quickens. He picks up his pace.
I look away from him. Through the half-opened drape I see the moon, looking in on me, hanging there in empty black, above the cheap signs and billboards. I think of how far away from home I am way out here.I turn back and look at him. I fake it a little more.
"Yer so hot" he pants.
"Yeah, fuck you too" I think. "Mmmmm" is all I say.
He's breathing hard now. I feel his muscles contract as he grunts repeatedly, then it's over. He relaxes on top of me, his skin, cold now with sweat. I feel his weight against my chest, his body soft, and overweight. He tries to kiss me again, and I turn.
"I have to get up" I say, as I move out from under him and grab my purse as I head for the bathroom.
He just lays there. I turn on the shower and get in. The water's hot and feels good against me after that. I let myself relax and go for the tiny bar of soap.
When I get back out, he's dressed, sitting on the bed and watching TV.
"Hey" he says, turning to look at me as I get dressed. I return the glance, and he says "that was great, can we do it again some time?"
"You know where I am" I smile< wishing he would just go away and never come back. "I've gotta get back" I say.
"Yeah" he says, turning off the television and getting up.
We're silent in the car as he drives me back to where he found me. Jerr's back, and Sarah's still there, but Janie's gone off. He smiles and waves as I get out of his car.
"Yeah, right, say hi to your wife and kids for me" I think.
He drives off.
"Hey Carr- how yeah doin'?" Jerry says, putting an arm around me.
"Oh, I'm OK Jerr, what time is it?"
"Not quite two babe."
"How was he?" Sarah asks then laughs before I can answer.
"Yeah, that about says it all, Hon." I laugh too. "Where's Janie?"
"Oh, she left about ten minutes ago, -some dweeb in a Mercedes. They're over there at the gas station."
"Hey Jerr," I say, "I'll be right back OK? I'm just gonna run over to the Texaco a minute."
"No problem Carr, be careful, OK?"
"Yeah, I'll be back in a minute."
I walk across the parking lot and head for a pay phone with tears in my eyes.

© 1999 C-Music All Rights Reserved

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